I’ve been seeing a lot of ‘projects’ going around. Some writing, some photography. Some for 30 days. Some are once a week. Some are once a day. They all intrigue me and yet I couldn’t pick one to sign onto. Partly because I’m horrible at sticking with something EVERY /insert whatever time frame you want/. I get sidetracked and miss a week/day/month/what-have-you and get discouraged. On the other side, I get really into it and want to do twenty in a day.
Enter my own project. Loose rules. Loose timing. Loose- just like me. Wait, that’s not right. Anyway, to coincide with some HUGE changes I’m finally making in my life, I’ve decided to take a look at myself. A brutally honest look. I’m doing this figuratively and literally. My goal is to take 365 pictures of myself, post them in groups or individually and write about what they say about me. I am giving myself a year…but I’m not forcing them into any set time frame. They will most likely come in bursts and there will likely be long droughts.
Right. So, for the first one.
This is likely the most honest picture I’ve ever posted of myself. I’d spent the last 4 hours crying. Pulling at my hair, nose gushing sobbing. My in-computer camera turned itself on, as it is in some odd habit of doing, and I saw this. This is who I’ve been the last few weeks. I’ve been stressed more than I’ve ever been. I’m choosing to be happy. Choosing to do what’s best for me and yet…it’s breaking my heart at the same time.