I’m having trouble enjoying Xanga lately. There could be several reasons for this. Let’s discuss. Or I write and you read as the case might be.
Got caught up in some micro-drama that involved a psycho (in my opinion) stalker bitch and her ex-boyfriend. That’s over now. I blocked her and moved on. Besides really pissing me off and causing her ex (my friend) a shit load of pain, it wasn’t that big of a deal. And most of the drama happened on Facebook. So, I think I’ll rule that one out.
A lot of my closest Xangan friends, though not all, have stopped blogging. They have their reasons and most I can understand and respect. And most of them, I still talk to on IM and Facebook…so in the end I haven’t really lost anything. Other than the really good posts they used to write.
Lastly, I got caught up, in my mind, in a friendship with another Xangan. I made it more than it was, again in my mind, and now it’s nothing at all. I miss him. A lot. His friendship. His witty comments. Honestly though, I think I MAY be better off now that he’s gone. He’s like a drug to me. I can’t say no, but regret every time I indulge. It was nice to imagine that maybe, just maybe he felt something for me. However, when I pushed and then shoved him to be honest he was silent. I’ve analyzed that response, to be sure, but have failed to really come up with an answer. Other than he thinks I’m crazy. And I suppose I am.
It’s sad that this is most likely the reason I’m not ‘feeling’ Xanga lately. Especially considering I brought it on myself. This isn’t an anit-Xanga rant though. It has little to do with anyone but me and how I’m feeling in general. I certainly have no plans to go blog anywhere else. I’m just not sure I feel like blogging at all.
And that’s incredibly sad.